PMD Awareness

In true Premenstrual Disorder (PMD) fashion I am arriving late to the scene, with Starbucks in hand but ready to over work and overcompensate for the time lost while I was in dungeon cave mode. Except I am a bit more senior in my class of disorder so, you know, I don’t drink caffeine anymore and I usually actually show up a half hour early to make sure no one realizes I have something wrong with me and use every excuse I can think of to explain things that happen in my life EXCEPT for ever admitting to actually having a disorder that effects my everyday life because if I do that I am weak, unreliable, and categorically disabled. THE HORROR.

If the above paragraph makes any sense to you at all, hello, nice to see you. Thank you for joining me on this journey it’s been lonely in here. If the above paragraph makes no sense to you, hello, and welcome to the world of PMD. This blog is not just for those suffering from PMD so why don’t you stay a while and see where this goes. It never hurts to be a little informed now does it?

Today is about awareness. April is PMD Awareness month and boy am I excited to have an entire month dedicated to other people understanding me more. Like I said before, I am a few days “late”. You see the International Association for Premenstrual Disorders (IAPMD) rolled out a challenge for the month of April to bring awareness to PMD. Makes sense right? Well, that started on the first. The first for me was day 17 of my cycle. That may not mean anything to anyone of you, even if you have PMD. See thats one of the funny things about PMD. It doesn’t effect everyone the same way or at the same time. In fact, PMD can be broken down even further. There are different types of PMD. The type of PMD I have is called Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD). Lately, it starts around day 14 for me. You know that feeling you get just before a big storm is about to happen? Nothing bad has happened yet but you know that smell and how the air just feels different. It almost gives you a little pit in your gut. That’s how day 14 is for me. Time to batten down the hatches boys cause shits about to get wild!

My plan this month is to take you through the days of my cycle in real time while connecting them to the writing prompts IAPMD has provided us with. By the time we get to the 30th of this month I should be around my 20th day of my cycle. Over the past few months my cycle has shortened a bit unfortunately. This means I am experiencing symptoms more frequently. A “normal cycle” is usually between 21-40 days with the average being 28 days. I used to run like clockwork. So on schedule I used to refer to her as the Alpha Vagina because no one could alter my cycle and I would disrupt everyone else’s. Well, currently I am sitting at 24 day cycles.

So I was late because my worst days of my cycle, when I am in dungeon cave mode, started this month and ya know I just wasn’t going to push it. Sometimes we have to make those decisions for ourselves. Day 17 has become a day depleted of energy, irritation of sounds and lack of focus for me along with dizzying spells when I stand up too quickly. I spent all day bingeing the entirety of Pieces of Her on Netflix. This is one of my biggest self care choices, and YES it is self care.

While I wish this were an April Fools Day joke, it is not. PMDD is real and the more time we dedicate to understanding how things like this work the better off a lot of us will be. PMDD does not just effect those with the disorder, it effect those closest to the person suffering. There is not enough research into women’s health and it is a very real problem.

PMDD Awareness is Suicide Prevention (more on this in the next post).